I sure hate to fly. I used to love it, you know, airports are exciting, going new places, seeing new things, it used to be fun. I suppose most folks get used to it earlier than I did, I was 17 the first time I flew on a commercial jet.

Anywhocares, I have been getting pretty sick and damn tired of the airlines acting all special n shit, tossing rock stars and film directors off their planes, charging people for ridiculous shit, and just generally acting like assholes. Its why I now hate to fly. Don't mind turbulence, hard landings, I'm cool with it. I Hate paying a fuckton of money to be treated like cattle, though. That's what most airlines do now. Takes yer money, treats ya like shit.

Here are some airlines and some perks they offer. Enjoy.

You know what? On Singapore Airlines, in first class, you may enjoy Dom Perignon, and Krug champagne. On their shiny new A380s, you can get fucking CABINS! Get two next to each other, and make a double. Kick ass.

Asiana Airlines offers sommelier service on select flights. Thats fancy wine folks walkin round, pairing wine n cheese n shit. Also, and  closely related, they offer pregosaurs seats close to the cans, and ' high priority luggage delivery'. Whatever that is. It sounds badass! Warm socks, too.

This picture popped up during a Google image search of ' rich', and 'pregnant'.

Emirates Air's A380s have fucking showers in them. Fuck, it must be nice to be rich.

Really rich.

Virgin will not only NOT charge you for meals, unlike most airlines these days, but they will get ya all boozed up for free. Yep. 'Welcome Cocktails'. Not only that, if you don't feel like bringing your laptop with you, they will loan you one for the flight.  Plus, they will bring your sporting goods without charging you extra. Within reason, of course. They will allow you to bring on the plane, in addition to your carryon, and checked luggage, your bicycle. Or your skis. Golf bag. Hang glider. Archery stuff. Windsurfboard.  Your own parachute. Bowling ball, and pins. Diving gear.

Everything you need for a family vacation, except the acid.

Cool.