Ok, then

I have something to confess to.

I watched Twilight.

And I really, really liked it.

Really.

Ok, that last part is a lie, but I did dig some of the outdoor shots of the northwest. Some of you may be aware that I really like that part of the United States. I'm sure that most of it was CGI, but I'm easily entertained, so fuck it. I enjoyed looking at the Columbia River Gorge, Multnomah Falls, and the look of small town Washington. I like it.

The rest of the movie blew, as you probably know. I found myself wishing death upon each and every character, but as much as I tried to look away from the TV and immerse myself in the world of Dalton (who is awesome), my eyeballs kept finding themselves focused back on that vampire weeny and his whiney, dumb girlfriend. I think that the fact that I am not a 13 year old girl may have contributed to my intense dislike for these made up people. Just sayin.

I am considering starting a non-profit organization to get Stephanie Meyer a writing class or two. Character development is evidently not her strong suit, but maybe that was editing. I'll never know, because I have instructed my family to please end my life if they see one of the Twilight series of books in my possession, or around my person.

I read in the news today a story about a Nebraska man who has started a petition, because he is pissed off about having to work on Thanksgiving. Dude pushes shopping carts around the parking lot of a Target in Omaha, and is scheduled to work starting at 11pm that Thursday, because of the whole Black Friday rowdeedow.

First, Homeboy, be glad you have a job. There is a metric fuckton of folks who would love to be in your position right now. Your sense of entitlement is one of the reasons the rest of the world laughs at us Americans. Talk about a first world problem. Well the whole article is chock full of rich white guy problems. First, Douchebag McPetition and his 'OH SNAP, I gotta go to beddy bye early on Turkey Day', and then the woman who is upset because she, being a stereotypical American consumer, now MAY HAVE TO SKIP THANKSGIVING to go wait in line at a fucking Target. Fuck, man, talk about having goofy priorities. And yes, before you ask, she does have a family. She does this shit with her 4 goddamn sisters.

This. Holy shit.

I shouldn't judge, but WTFever. People spend so much energy acquiring stuff. You think her family gives a shit about her Hummel figurines, or 9/11 commemorative plates from the Franklin Mint, or do you think they would rather they share each others company? I dunno, if I had a relative that was that in love with hemorrhaging money, I might WANT them to go. Whatever lady. Go buy your rubber dogshit and whatever else. I really shouldn't judge this woman, but I can't help it. She, and the dingleberry who's pissed because he has a job at a time when so many others don't, are the kind of people that... Shit, I don't know. It takes a village, and it takes a village idiot. Thanks, Don.